Anatomy of a Nod

April 9, 2009

What's in a nod?

Is it a friendly hello?  A non-verbal "Hi!  How are ya?"  Sometimes, yes. 

Not just nods however, what's in a wave?  Or a point?  Or a wink?  Nonverbal communication is very common these days, especially on bustling college campuses where there are literally thousands of people in a small concentrated area at any given time. 

When I'm walking around campus, I'll see a buddy from across the hall and seek him out like it's a football route: five steps slant right, skinny Z-Post in for the handshake.  Nice and firm, grip with the thumbs wait for an even brake-off point.  Simple, yet complicated at the same time.  Often, this handshake is accompanied with a "What's going on?" or the less interested "Good to see ya."

On the complicated hierarchy of nonverbal touches and body movements, the handshake is one of the more serious and committed.  Let us now examine a few members of the hierarchy and what each non-verbal act means to the general public. 

The Upward Nod.  A chin-to-the-air neck jerk complimented by a slight squint of both eyes.  This popular nonverbal gesture is usually done from far distances; for example, while one is at a large social gathering or walking in a large congregated area, like a college campus, an upward nod will be given and received.  An upward nod characterizes respectability...to a point.  It basically means, "I like enough to acknowledge your existence, but not enough to walk all the hell the way over to where you are standing to actually say hello."   An upward nod is not a bad thing; if it had to be one or other it would be a good thing, basically equivalent of someone yelling, "What's up?" 

The Downward Nod.  A chin dip that requires darting eyes to remain in contact with the now different-level receiver.  Downward nods are usually not a great thing.  They basically imply, "I don't really like you, but I know who you are, so now I have to acknowledge your existence."  It's a minimal amount of movement that elicits a minimal response.  From my own personal experiences, I usually give a downward nod to people I know that I am not crazy about, but know that they have no problem with me.  I figure if it's an enemy, I'll get no non-verbal movement whatsoever and an abrupt about-face turn to avoid any contact or view whatsoever.  Beware the downward nod; giving them are almost as bad as receiving them.

The High-Five.  Dude, cool.  A high-five is an honorable action that includes fun at the same time.  Loud noises (slap!) accompanied by a crisp, quick extension of the arm to the highest point in the air possible is always fun.  A high-five is usually a non-verbal gesture that means, "Dude, you are awesome, so awesome in fact that you deserve a high-five."  High-fives are also reserved for acknowledgements of great achievement, for example, "Dude you just ate four Big Macs in 20 minutes!  High-Five!"  Granted, the achievement has to be cool, i.e. binge eating, throwing down a slam-dunk, break-dancing.  High-fives are almost always a positive action and one of the more enthusiastic forms of nonverbal communication.

The Point.  The pointing of one's middle finger can signify different things.  Sometimes it means "Thanks", other time it means "It's your fault."  The point is both good and bad depending on the situation.  A positive form of the point often includes another of the aforementioned actions, such as the upward nod or high-five.  In those situations, the point is used to signify the finding of someone one knows in one's line of sight, followed by acknowledgement.

The Thumbs-Up.  The thumbs-up is one of the oldest nonverbal communication actions around.  It simply implies one thing: Good.  For example, a thumbs-up can either mean "I'm good" or "I'm ok", while at the same time also meaning "Good job, buddy!"  If one receives a thumbs-up, something positive is happening. 

The Middle Finger.  The middle finger is never good.  Ever.   It says, "I hate you, a lot, past the point of simply ignoring you, and the point that I want to express my extreme dislike."  The middle finger is often utilized while driving, a common place for aggressiveness and peeving actions that will merit the middle finger. 

Remember these explanations and practice these like you would your golf swing.  They mean more than some think.