To All My Single Ladies

May 6, 2009

It's the afternoon of the big night, your first date with a boy you really like. You've spent all day agonizing over what you are going to wear, how you are going to do your make-up, and which scent will drive him wild. You have squeezed in a last-minute workout to boost your self-esteem, bought some new shoes, and tweezed yourself to perfection. You are ready.

It is now 15 minutes until he is supposed to arrive and all of the sudden you remember all the reasons you are single, all the horrible dating mishaps that have fallen upon you in the past. So, here is a little bit of advice to hopefully push you through to date number two.

Step one:  Go with the natural glow. Fake tanning has been marketed as the "cure-all" of pasty winter look but so much can go wrong that experimentation right before the big night isn't a good idea. When you try to tan during the winter you have two options: beds or spray. Tanning beds take a couple weeks to build up the right glow, but many times, anxious customers try to get it done in one session. This often results in a lobster red hue rather than bronze beauty. The other alternative is spray tanning. Without the correct preparations one could emerge resembling an Oompa Loopma with an all over orange glow or a tiger with stripes on their arms and legs. The hazards of the faux glow far outweigh the positives, so ladies accept your pale skin and wear it with confidence.

Step two:  Pick the cute but wearable shoes. We know you want to wear the 5" Manolo's you just purchased, but tripping and breaking your ankle might put a damper on the night. Your guy has taken the time to plan out a fun and exciting evening for you and staggering around like a drunken fool because you can't walk in your own shoes is embarrassing. Sure they are "in-style" and "so hot right now" but all the rationalizing in the world won't make you Heidi Klum on the runway. Therefore, choose the shoes that complement your outfit but allow you to participate in a variety of activities throughout the night. Not only will you enjoy yourself more, but your feet will be glad to have the night off too.

Step three:  Drink responsibly (if at all). When women get a little too much booze in them, they tend to talk too much. Although he is interested in your ex-boyfriends, your secret hidden talents and everything else you choose to disclose while under the trance of your liquid courage, your man would like to know more about you. That's the point of a date isn't it? So put down the third Appletini you just ordered and pull yourself together. Show him what a great person you are through your job, family and friends. Sure a drink or two can take off the edge of a first date but getting hammered like you are on spring break might make him think you are still stuck in your college days.

Step four:  Play it cool. We all have experienced embarrassing moments while on a date, but playing it off is key. When you finally realize your spinach pasta is stuck right between your middle teeth don't freak out and run to the bathroom; laugh it off and discreetly remove it. If you happen to have your dress stuck in your underwear after leaving the bathroom play it off by saying, "well aren't you lucky to get a little show in the first date." A good sense of humor and witty catchphrases can see a woman through just about any blunder. Even if it is the most tragic thing keeping your cool will enable you to move forward with little awkwardness. If you seem unphased so will he.

Step five:  Don't freak out if he doesn't call right away. No he didn't loose your number, nor did he decide he hates you. He might be busy or just waiting for the right moment. All women have fallen victim to the "what-if scenarios" but in the end it just makes us look dumb. So don't stalk your answering machine, if he calls you will know. That's what they invented Caller ID for now isn't it? Back away from the phone and go on living your life. If he wants to see you again he will call it just might take some time.

The dating game is a hard one to crack. The best a girl can do is to feel confident and be herself. Don't end it before it begins by making the common but fatal mistakes that so many women do. So, get excited, finish your last minute preparations and have a good date.